Mosquitoes in Heaven

Jerry Fieri discovers that he is upon a field where ahead of him is a gate. He quickly surmises that his life on Earth had come to an end and that he is now on the verge of entering Heaven. This does not surprise him in the least since he had led an exemplary life that did not veer from the tenets and expectations of his faith. What does surprise him however was the man that worked at the gate. It was not St. Peter. It was just a regular guy by the name of Stan who quickly buries Jerry in reams of paperwork. Bureaucracy has an afterlife as well. Amongst the paperwork was a vow that required Jerry to swear that he would not harm any living thing that he finds up here. When Stan asks Jerry where he would like to settle, Jerry decided that he wanted to live in something akin to the rolling country of Kentucky. He had lived his life in the urban sprawl of Baltimore and thought that he would prefer the bucolic lifestyle instead.