Onion Head Monster Attacks! Attacks anything there is that can be attacked. Ant People? Attacked. Dr. Strangegutt? Attacked. Robots? Attacked. The Mobster Lobsters (from Las Vegas)? Attacked. Jet... More > Pack Jane? Attacked. The Dark Zerto? Attacked. Ape Rat? Attacked.
Who's next? You?< Less
Astonishment is a collection of twenty brief essays about "life in the slow lane." Author Jan Slepian comments on the astonishment of being old, the comfort and heartbreak of companionship... More > in a retirement community, and the ridiculous moments in everyday life. Utterly delightful, entertaining and amusing. Illustrated by Laura Schreiber, who shares the author's wonderful tongue in cheek style.< Less
Learn to identify orgasms (Os) that you have had but have not correctly identified! Throw off the chains of Big-O oppression! Discover your own multiorgasmic nature and embrace all of your orgasms! ... More > You too can be multiorgasmic< Less
Hey - seriously - congratulations on your new political post!
If you are reading this, it means that you have ascended to the highest levels of government, so it's really, really important that you... More > don't do or say anything stupid, and screw things up for the rest of us.
The first thing to remember is that you are a figurehead, about as relevant to the direction of the state as a hood ornament is to the direction of a car -- but you are a very important distraction, the "smiling face" of the fist of power. So hold your nose, kiss the babies, and just think how good you would look on a stamp.
Now, before we go into your media responsibilities, you must understand the true history of political power, so you don't accidentally act on the naive idealism you are required to project to the general public.
The reality of political power is very simple: bad farmers own crops and livestock -- good farmers own human beings...< Less
Did you live in the greatest city of sin on the entire planet during your 20s? I sure as hell did, and I barely survived. I'm BD and I'm "that guy". Don't tell me to take it easy, I'm... More > fiiiiiiine.
This book is about "that guy" spending a decade in Vegas mocking karma and fate. You can love me, hate me, praise me or despise me, but you're going to enjoy living vicariously through me.
AUTHORS NOTE: Don't buy this on Amazon if you can avoid it, their printer sucks. Go directly to lulu.com for a higher quality copy.< Less
"How to Be Old, A Beginner's Guide" is a continuation of Jan Slepian's funny and poignant essays on life in the slow lane. If you loved her first book, "Astonishment, Life in the Slow... More > Lane", you will be just as crazy about this one.< Less
Cheeky, wacky and, at times, downright silly, this debut collection of personal essays (and companion pieces) highlights some of (mis)adventures of the curious and painfully observant author, Terryn... More > Sundy. From receiving an impromptu peepshow while standing on a sidewalk in London to witnessing an act of self-gratification while on a 1st date to receiving a glam-rock groupie makeover and getting propositioned by the singer of a well-known hair-metal band, she re-tells these stories with a level of detail and humor that makes the readers wish they were there to experience the zaniness first-hand. As companion pieces and extra insight into her brain, she also includes "How-To" guides on how to avoid some sticky situations in the future, plus lists of some things that she loves (and hates). You're Not A Ninja, And No...You Can't Spend The Night is like reading the diary of your witty, adventurous, potty-mouthed, boy-crazy best friend who never fully grew up.< Less
Automotive writer Doug DeMuro is sharing his stories. In “Plays With Cars,” the former Porsche manager covers some of his most ridiculous decisions, like buying an old Land Rover sight... More > unseen, taking a Mercedes AMG station wagon to a rural Georgia dragstrip, and roadtripping across the United States in a Lotus Elise without air conditioning. He’s also reviewed his former cars, which range from a Mercedes G-wagen to a Nissan Cube. Most importantly, he wrote this entire description himself in the third person.< Less
The author of this book, Prince Israel Oyerinde Omotosho, has compiled more than eighty jokes and short stories for your enjoyment. The jokes and stories are contextually based in Nigeria, West... More > Africa. They will make you laugh till your ribs protest!< Less
***ADULT EDITION - STRONG LANGUAGE***
This is a compilation of comics from the popular facebook page of Vegan Sidekick, along with a few new comics and a quick guide on how to respond to those who... More > defend animal cruelty or attack veganism.< Less
Do you ever notice people browsing the clearance rack at Nordstrom that look like they just finished a vigorous cross-fit session at the gym? Do you see people putting 89-octane fuel in their 1995... More > Ford Taurus wagons instead of regular 87-octane? Do you remember that lady holding up the express lane at Wal-Mart because she was digging through her purse for the exact change, even though she had a debit card in her wallet?
If you have seen your fellow man, or woman, doing any of these things, or things of equivalent foolishness, and wondered what happens to such individuals, then this book provides the answer.
They get lice.< Less
An extremely candid, raw and humorous view of marriage and the decision to potentially cheat on your spouse. You will gasp and laugh while contemplating the decision to cheat.
This book is not for... More > everyone. It is not a biography, rather the author’s opinion and overview on a very sensitive and prevalent subject. The author has a warped sense of humor and it comes to life through this book. It is candid, raw and tells the hard truth about infidelity. Some will find it incredibly funny, some will gasp when reading it and some readers will do both.
There is a men’s and women’s version in this one book. The men start on one end and if you flip the book over, you will be in the women’s version. They are nearly identical but there are subtle differences.
The book speaks directly to the reader and nothing is sacred. You will be entertained and educated on the taboo subject of adultery. Keep an open-mind while reading the book and you will come to appreciate and understand what the author is saying.< Less
Freeloaders. We’ve all encountered them at one time or another. Tobias Turtle is lazy, self-absorbed, and lives his life preying on the generosity and pity of others. Yet he is not too lazy to... More > have one ridiculous get-rich-quick scheme after another. As a counter-point is human Fred, the hard-working, level-headed and long-suffering victim of Tobias’ mooching ways, and attempted voice of reason, who has taken Tobias in and tries, unsuccessfully, to reform him. Allegorically, Fred might be seen as the traditional American citizen, who has come up believing the way to be happy and successful is hard work, moderation in all things and a dedication to help others. Tobias is that element of society that believes in getting something for nothing, in quick-fixes and laziness, self-absorption and excess.< Less
Sam lives a simple, quiet existence in his remote, Canadian cabin. Sure he might be bored, sure he might talk to trees sometimes, sure he spends the majority of his time just trying to survive the... More > brutal winters, but he's happy. Pretty much. That is until all the animals around him start killing themselves.
And that is until he befriends a talking, 600 pound Canadian Grizzly bear, and together they set out on a booze fueled adventure that starts as an escape across the Canadian wilderness but quickly devolves into drunken brawls with coyotes, golfing with opossums, a healthy dose of arson, and finally they find themselves in a quest to save the world from a second apocalypse.< Less
Based on the award winning one-person-play, The Emergency Monologues is a series of short stories and anecdotes, which show you the world of accidents and emergencies that few get to see. Touching... More > and hilarious, The Emergency Monologues is guaranteed to leave you with a greater understanding of those who dial 911 and to those who answer the call. You'll be amazed at how much you can laugh at tales of blood and poo.
Now enhanced with almost 100 cartoons by the brilliant Vince Cheng, The Emergency Monologues is taken to a new level.< Less
It was always interesting to watch new neighbors move in. I can’t say I really looked forward to new people. I liked my neighbors to be like a restrained stalker: vaguely familiar and a good... More > 500 feet away at all times.
Thus begins the hilariously funny semi-fictional tale of a suspicious new neighbor and the colorful cast of dysfunctional family members that help to keep one woman's life in a constant state of uncertainty.
Brimming with sarcasm, this 13K word comedy novella will have you wondering "Where the Hell has H.J. Ream been all my life?" and "Why aren't all comedy writers this good?"< Less
Jack Blumner takes you behind the scenes of the Old Testament, as never before, in this sidesplitting meditation on the Five Books of Moses. Your favorite bible stories are all here – the... More > creation of man, the story of Noah’s Ark, the trials of Abraham, the Exodus from Egypt, the giving of the Ten Commandments, and much more – seen through the divinely skewed revelations of Jack Blumner and illustrator, Michael Malbrough.
As if that were not enough, you’ll also ﬁnd the answers to questions about the Bible you never thought to ask, such as:
• How did the splitting of the Red Sea inadvertently repel an
• How did the Children of Israel respond when God took cheeseburgers off the menu?
• How did vampires react to the commandment against the consumption of blood?
God gave man the ability to both cry and to laugh, but Scripture teaches that a cheerful heart is the preferred alternative. God Said, Let There Be Humor, is a witty expression of the author’s belief that even God can take a joke.< Less
After four years of working as a busser, Ghassan Jabali has emerged to tell all about his life and experiences in the restaurant biz. Have a walkthrough of the infamous restaurant Fiemme, in the NJN... More > Hotel and Casino. Welcome to Fiemme is a collection of mishaps and stories about all the bussers, servers and hostesses as they work in Las Vegas.< Less
Enjoy reading how people deal with their crap and question how we treat people when their crap is not flushed down the toilet appropriately.
Feedback from others:
“Best bathroom book... More > of the year.”
It may encourage terms like “the crap talk,” “commode talk,” and “toilet literature.”< Less
Grade A Papers is a collection of funny, refreshingly original fake student papers and POLITICAL and CELEBRITY PARODIES. This coffee table book contains 30 wacky, whimsical student papers; a... More > hysterical parody of billionaire Ken Griffin, Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel, and entertainer Jon Stewart; 4 hilarious composition theorists parodies & 30+ custom-made designs by artists across the world.
This book began as a practical joke & turned into an enterprise. Michael Feldman of Public Radio International’s "Whad'ya Know" show calls it "Quite an amazing stylist in this…and funny!"
Cartoonist Joe Martin of The Washington Post’s "Mr. Boffo" & "Willy n’ Ethel" acclaim says: "I hold the Guinness Record for writing 40,000 jokes. Schaefer has put more than that in one book and I think she may have more funny ones."
This book pokes friendly fun at the random eccentricities & idiosyncrasies of college teachers, students, politicians and celebrities.< Less
Keely Flynn, founder of Lollygag Blog, recounts the bumpy transition from a carefree twentysomething to that of a card-carrying grownup- all in the space of one year. From buying a broken-down... More > foreclosure to (surprise!) a new baby in the first year of marriage, life comes fast and hilarious as Flynn navigates the joys, pitfalls, and taco cravings that go hand-in-hand with parenthood, homeownership, and some semblance of adulthood.< Less