Conceptual Laws and Customs of Christmas

If Christmas had been a Jewish holiday, the laws and customs of Christmas would have been published and might look something like in this satire. The detailed laws and customs cover the following; • Preparing for Christmas including when to start the preparations • The tree including the type and size • Decorating the tree including the need for symmetry • The Christmas lights including the types • Gifts and gift giving including when they may be opened and distinguishing between childish and adult gifts • The office party including where and when it should take place • The festive meals including what should be eaten at each meal • Santa Claus; the myths and reality • Rituals of the synagogue service for each service including when to say Hallel and with and without a blessing • Christmas and Chanukah; distinguishing between them