Send Lawyers, Guns, and Monkeys: The Collected Blogs

Pointless rants! Stupid lists! Random swearing! You'll find all that and more in this collection of internet blogs from complete unknown Ryan Smith. Why is he publishing them? Does he have something profound to say about the human condition? Can he teach you to laugh at that crazy thing called love? Can he help you flatten your abs in just six weeks? No. No, he can't. The truth is, Ryan basically just wants attention. So buy this book, prop up his fragile self-esteem, and read his thoughts on topics ranging from stupid mafia nicknames to terror in the lingerie department, anatomy sales to Sherlock Holmes. Please, just buy the book. That way, maybe he'll stop calling us.