An Unsuitable Boy

I am Karan Johara, native of Bitihar. I am doing PhD on a very important subject “Mating habits of gay chimpanzees in West Africa” at PANU University, the best University in India and possibly the best University in the world. My idols are “Faizal Guru”, “Janab Kasab Sahib”, “Focus Carat”, “Baba Badkar”, “Zakir Nalayak”, “Gharkha Dutt”, “Dr. Kana Ayyub” and all PhD students who had committed suicide since they failed to solve their PhD problems. I personally feel that, all deprived Indians should automatically be awarded a PhD degree coupled with a free pension of 1 lakh rupees/month to be delivered in cash via post at door step. Till then we are going to fight for azaadi from India. Imagine a day, when no PhD student would have to commit suicide, imagine a day, when no lower caste will be humiliated by upper caste, s/he can use his/her doctorate degree and force others to call him/her Dr. X, Dr. Y ,etc.