Seeing Crabs

Many years ago, the Professor took a drug, supposedly the stimulant favoured by shamans and witch doctors. It did not have quite the effect he was hoping for. Ever since that day, the Professor has seen crabs: first one, then two, and soon in uncountable numbers. Though they are generally well-behaved and visible to no-one else, the Professor can neither command nor control them; and nowadays he can also hear them. As a new administration threatens major academic improvements, and with limited consolation from his grounding in philosophy, the Professor copes as best he can with the real and the unreal.