This is not a real book. It’s actually a notebook/journal. Or, as we call it, a Phantom Book. Because why have a boring journal when that space could be used diabolically? Carry it into a meeting. Leave it on your desk at work. Gift it to a friend with absolutely no explanation. He’s Usually Not Like This is disguised as a parenting guide to managing your child’s brand in public—teaching you how to establish context, redirect the narrative, and make sure everyone knows that whatever your child just did is wildly out of character.