Surviving Narcissism in a Relationship

You are a target for a narcissist because your previous relationships or family history involves experiences of abuse, narcissism, etc pulls him or her in as your savior at first. It is worse if you don't have any templates for relationships— you have nothing to compare with. Some people are so accustomed to being abused in the past that when a narcissist traps them, it just is normal. For you to be a perfect victim for a narcissist does not just happen overnight. You could have been molded by your previous encounters in the past — narcissistic parents or relatives or previous dysfunctional romantic relationships. If you don't break the cycles of abuse or narcissism in your life, you go from one broken relationship to another. The overly empathetic person also is a very good target for a narcissistic person because you are an emotional sponge and also an endless supply for an emotional vampire. This kind of person is easy to manipulate because they are open and willing to go above and beyond to fix the narcissist's issues. You believe that you can save him or her from them but you are wrong. When you are empathetic, it is very difficult for you to escape your abuser because you overly compromise your emotions and feelings hoping that tomorrow would be better. Every time you try to leave a narcissist, they will use your empathetic nature against you. He or she cares to threaten to kill themselves if you leave. You fall into the narcissistic trap because you don't know any better. Usually, they find you in moments when you are helpless or hopeless. We all have been there. A narcissist is so good at their game that they appear to be the solution when you need it the most. Accepting a narcissist does not make you a bad or weak person; we all have moments of weakness. That is human nature — if you don't treat yourself as the victim that you already are, you learn so much about yourself and your abuser. Maybe you needed to learn that lesson. Maybe a narcissist raised you to be a narcissist magnet because you were their prey. The difference between surviving a narcissist and accepting abuse is the ability to remove yourself from the situation and see the situation for what it is. Whether you are a victim or perpetrator, we all have roles to play. Sometimes I think that there is a part of a narcissist that thrives in negativity and this is the reason why he or she arouses negative emotions out of you by causing you stress. Enjoy!