Parting Lines

Tim Hoskings was such a nice boy, but eventually nice boys turn into bitter men. Priorities change and decisions get made — like the decision to become an arsehole. To finally stop putting everyone else first and get what you want from life. At this point in time any rational person would turn to the fine art of negotiation, but the mid-life crisis isn’t a rational state of mind. It is a head-first plummet towards everything you haven’t been in the past. A jetpack strapped to your back accelerating you downwards, fuelled by the fear of regretting all the things you never did before that day when you are lying on your back rotting in a box and thinking to yourself, “F*ck.” * The letter U has a pending court case to battle discrimination against vowels. “Sex, drugs and very little of educational value.” ­ BELINDA CASTLES